ImPROMPTu

It would be a toss up between my procrastination and being my harshest critic. At time the two go and hand. I will literally critique myself so hard while in process that I’ll stagnate myself due to second guessing each step. It’s mainly done to minimize mistakes but I know that mistakes are an unwritten part of the plan. Innately I’m a perfectionist and thrive on things being in order but the overall things don’t work that way and I know that consciously but subconsciously I feel like I can work against that and still manage to be ok, even though I’m proven wrong most times. Watching people who somehow have the confidence to move on impulse when it comes to smaller decisions even boggles my mind…it’s like watching people with no fear dive head first into a 10 foot pool and I’m walking into the shallow end inch by inch double checking to make sure I’m not going too far too fast. And before I know it I’m neck deep in water not worried about a thing. Obviously we are all designed differently but I just need an ounce of that “fuck it” and I think I’ll be good.