Bismillah.
As usual on my days off, I write down the errands I need to run and try to get as much of them done as possible. Well, today I didn’t come close to completing my lis. Not because I couldn’t but because of an almost three hour conversation I had with an older black gentleman outside of a smoothie shop decided to stop at. It began with me asking him how he felt about this year as a whole. I enjoy hearing people of all walks perspectives on everything. The first thing he said was, “it’s been a hell of a one but I’ve seen worse for sure.” He then went on to explain how he’s lived through the tale end of Jim Crow and then coming of age during the Civil Rights movement. One thing I noticed about his commentary on the times was, he always had a positive outlook but remained rooted in reality. It was like he completely understood his place in society but also knew that playing to it would make his life worse. As the conversation went on, he reversed the original question I’d asked him. And the only thing I could think of was, “we literally have the same perspective, just in different times.”. This year has certainly been a trying one for many people in many ways. It’s caused some to begin a journey devoting more time focusing on self, others have taken a turn for the worse. Something I’m constantly thankful for is the positive turn my life has made. On the outside looking in everything was fine, all the while a storm was brewing that I didn’t even know in progress. Which is what happens when suppression is your coping mechanism.
So as the conversation went on, he began to talk about how he and his wife raised 5 kids and how he taught them to use reflection as a cure. As we got on to the topic of reflection, I began to have my own moments of reflection during our talk. Which at one point he noticed lol. He even asked “Hey man, you still here?”. I’d drifted off and hadn’t even noticed it. But once I snapped back, I told him that through that short recollection I realized that this was the beginning of a 5 year transition into Mastery(40 is the age of Mastery). I’d began to master myself and didn’t even noticed. The first step, was finding love within myself because without said love you’ll never be vulnerable enough exude full confidence. The second step I’d taken was, finding my passion and turning it into an outlet. These two things alone will propel anyone into their full self. Physically I’ve never been this still in my life but mentally, emotionally and spiritually I’ve been as busy as I’ve ever been. I’ve genuinely learned what makes me tick. On top of learning how to not take things personally, which has always been a bad habit of mine. It gave a lot of the wrong people power over my conscious especially as a kid. And I’ve noticed that once I stopped taking things personally, a lot of those those people became irrelevant. Some that stung my brain was the fact that everything that every time I do reflect look back on the year….it’s a positive vision. Obviously no one’s time on this planet is ever going to be perfect but I feel like it’s been as close to it as it could be. In my opinion, if people didn’t take the amount of time that was gifted back to us as time to evaluate themselves the it was time wasted.
I’m a firm believer in everything happening for a reason. So this meeting wasn’t by chance, there certainly was something behind it. I think it was intended to remind me of how far I’ve come as a human being and as a spiritual being. I’m gainly an understanding of my place not only on this planet but in the grand scheme of the universe. I was called into existence 35 years ago(I count the 9 months I was in the womb) and this year feels like I was birthed again. Not in the religious sense but in the sense of you learning who I was, who I am and who I’m becoming.
Asalaamu Alaykum.
Respect. 